MODULE 2: Your North Star
IN THIS LESSON
Wanting More
Have you ever felt a yearning for more? For more meaning, connection, purpose? To be more or have more in your life? Do you feel like something needs to change but you aren't even sure what? If you do, you aren't alone.
As human beings, we have an inherent need to evolve, to change, to grow. We are seeking purpose.
We understand and live in this reality when we are younger. The first several decades of our life are all about dreaming and goals. We are future focused. We go to school. We graduate. We establish ourselves in the world. We create relationships and cultivate careers. We set up homes. We want more for ourselves and we revel in creating that vision of the life we want.
Somewhere along the lines though, we stop dreaming. We lose track of who we are and what we really want. We stop imagining beyond what we already have. We don't allow ourselves to dream. We brush off or suppress the part of us that wants "more" because we think we should be happy with what we have.
We disconnect from the part of us that loves to dream, grow, change. We may start to feel empty, and unfulfilled, as though we are just going through the motions. We drink or eat or work more to distract from our own reality.
Dreaming and wanting more can feel really uncomfortable and inconvenient.
Acknowledging it means shaking it up, changing the status quo. Our brain, whose main job is to keep us safe, may freak out a little bit when we admit to ourselves that we want to make some changes in our life. This ignites our doubts, and fears, and potential for failure and can be really scary. After all, there is comfort in the familiar routine because we know what to expect.
Wanting From Abundance
If I were to ask you right now to tell me all of things you want, you would probably list lots of things that you don’t currently have – what you believe you are lacking, or what you hope for someday. Most people only allow themselves to want from a place of scarcity – from not enough-ness. When you dream with this kind of energy, it reminds you of what you don’t have and leads to feeling pretty bad. Wanting from scarcity sounds like, “When I accomplish this thing then I can finally feel happy”. This leads to the idea of chasing happiness and reinforces the confusion we have about where joy really comes from (_hint, it doesn’t come from outside of us. It comes from our thoughts). _
But did you know that you can want from abundance?
The idea of wanting from abundance is all about wanting what you already have – and sometimes wanting more. It sounds like “I want what I have, I love what I have, and I want more. “
You can want something just because you desire it, not because you’re unhappy in your current circumstance. You can want more knowing that you will be happy if you keep things the way they are, or if you make a change. You can want from satisfaction instead of dissatisfaction. From a place of expansion, evolvement, from truer expression and deeper alignment with yourself.
You are Allowed to Want More Without Apology
You can want what you want, and you don’t have to explain it to anyone. You just have to like your reason. I think this is so important because many times we struggle with owning our wants without needing to justify them.
We are socialized to be very good at meeting the wants and needs of the people in our lives but not nearly as good at this with ourselves. For many of us, even identifying our own wants can feel very difficult at first. Taking the time to figure them out is key.
Part of our work is deciding that we are worthy of wanting more and believing that more is possible for us.
Our Desires Are the Roadmap to Our Best Life
Our desires exist as the arrows pointing us towards the life we are meant for. As humans we are made for more and are full of potential. We are wired to evolve, to grow, and to become the highest versions of ourselves.
Acknowledging that part of you that is yearning for more is the first step. Take the time to ask yourself, “What do I really want? How do I want to live my life?” Ask yourself why.
Imagine your life, your future, if you could have it any way you wanted. Who would you be? How would you spend your time? What would your health look like? What kind of work would you do in the world? What would your relationships be like?
Allow yourself to want more. Allow yourself to dream. Know that the doubts and fears will creep up and this is part of the process. It doesn’t mean that anything has gone wrong.
Imagination is Powerful
We use our imaginations to visualize what does not yet exist. Everything you have in life is because you dreamed it up and made it happen. Consider this: Once upon a time, you had the idea that you could be a healthcare professional. You dreamed it up and then you made decision after decision to make it a reality.
Our imaginations are also very good at coming up with the worst case scenerio. In fact, many of us spend so much time worrying and talking ourselves out of our ideas and aspirations because we are afraid to fail. When we are not supervising our brains, our imaginations will for sure offer the worst case scenerio and will come up with lots of reasons for why you should not dare to want more.
Consider This Question:
What would you want if you could have anything?
Remember, we get to want whatever we want. When we practice the skill of managing our imagination, it will help us uncover our dreams and guide us towards an aligned life.
Think about it. Daydream. Take a walk and leave the headset behind. What do you want? Write it down. Bring it to coaching.